Understanding Emotions
A Fuller Concept of Happiness

A Fuller Concept of Happiness

If you want to be happy, you need to know what happiness is. Yet, it is widely misunderstood. Like many abstract concepts that involve values, the concept of “happiness” has been distorted, obfuscated, and denied by philosophers, making it harder for us to understand...

Thoughts on the Concept of “Stress”

Thoughts on the Concept of “Stress”

Stress is a real mechanical phenomenon. The picture with this article is a graphic showing a "finite element stress analysis." It's important to see how pressure on one part of the material can affect the strength of the material — and perhaps cause it to fail. It is...

Dealing with Earned Guilt Loops

Dealing with Earned Guilt Loops

Guilt is the emotion that you feel when you believe you have failed to live up to your own moral standards. It is perhaps the most enervating emotion. It makes you want to curl up in a little ball to block it out and avoid it. But that is the worst thing you can do....

Yes, You Can Put to Bed Old Issues

Yes, You Can Put to Bed Old Issues

In my previous article, I recommended that you have a value orientation toward your past actions even if you made a mistake. If you're feeling bad about something that happened in the past, there is something to learn about it and something to heal. Emotions only...

How Naming the Emotion Can Tell You Why You’re Going Nowhere

How Naming the Emotion Can Tell You Why You’re Going Nowhere

It happens to all of us. You decide your priority, you sit down to work on the project, and for one reason or another you go nowhere. Maybe you're not doing the work — you're resisting it. Or maybe you're doing it, but slogging along without much to show for your...

So You Don’t Feel Like Doing Anything

So You Don’t Feel Like Doing Anything

I've had every motivational problem ever. So when a participant in Launch 21 reported that she suddenly didn't feel like doing anything, I knew exactly what she was talking about. I call this being in a "funk." Suddenly, you live in a world that has nothing to offer...

The Value of Emotional Resilience

The Value of Emotional Resilience

"Emotional resilience" is the ability to suspend action on an emotional impulse. When you have more emotional resilience, you can suspend action despite stronger emotional impulses. As a 3-year-old, I developed the basics of emotional resilience playing "Mother May...

FAQ: What is empathy?

FAQ: What is empathy?

"Empathy" is a widely misunderstood concept. Understanding it properly is the first step to transforming your relationships with other people and yourself.  Empathy is not the same as sympathy.  Sympathy is a feeling you have in relation to someone else. You feel...

Why Do You Resist Doing Something Easy That Should Help You?

Why Do You Resist Doing Something Easy That Should Help You?

People sometimes come to me, distressed that they resist using "thinking on paper" or some other tactic. They are sure it would help them, they know that they can take the steps, but whenever the time comes to use the tactic, they feel a wall of resistance.  This...

What is Anxiety?

What is Anxiety?

Do you find the term "anxiety" a bit puzzling? It's always been described to me as a non-specific fear. My fears are always specific, so I never knew quite how to differentiate fear from anxiety until I read an article about anxiety by Brooke Castillo that clarified...

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